I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
