Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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