Whoa Z and x make the same sound
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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