Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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