Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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