im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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