try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Randomize
