i permit you to call me
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
