I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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