The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
