David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
