Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Randomize
