dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I'm bleeding and have questions
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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