well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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