Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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