left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
