That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
