You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
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