im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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