I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
