Say something about gay babies.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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