so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
