Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Don't make out with my wife yet
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Randomize
