everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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