Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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