she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize