Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize