Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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