so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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