She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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