We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
