I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
either way he was missing a nipple.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
