Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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