Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
