Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Randomize