people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize