whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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