get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
You dont lie about slip and slides
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize