you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
