Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
