I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
