it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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