i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I am one with the molecules
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Randomize
