so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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