is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
