My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Randomize
