He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize