shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
its liver damage thursday
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
