I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Randomize