my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
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